By citations we mean comments by past users or purchasers saying what a jolly good product or service you have.

Citations are by and large a good thing - providing that they are seen to be relevant by the reader - which is one of the key factors of our fundamental laws and the theory of direct mail.  What you have to do is see everything from the point of view of the reader.

Which means you have to provide citations in a style that are going to appeal to the readership.

If you are writing to professional people - teachers, accountants, doctors etc, you need to have citations from people in similar professions written in a meaningful way.  You need to quote the name of the person making the comment (in full) and you need to give that person's professional capacity.

One of the best professional citations I have seen was written by a headteacher commenting on a training course held in her school.  It went like this:

"I knew the course had been something special when all my staff were still discussing it in the staffroom at break the following day."

That is good because it is different from the norm, and because it is different it sounds as if it comes from the heart.  None of this, "an excellent course, we enjoyed every minute" - which is vague and generalised and said over and over again.  The citation above gives a headteacher's insight - which is ideal if the course is being sold to other headteachers.

But unfortunately the citation was then ruined because instead of being followed by the head's name it was followed by:

A Headteacher, Somerset.

What on earth was the point of that? It diminishes everything. Yes of course you have to ask a person's permission before you quote them.  But 99% of people agree to being quoted. What have they got to lose if they are giving their professional opinion?  (I appreciate in some areas there may be a problem - particularly in medical fields - but in most commercial areas of life, and in education, there is no such problem.)

Different approaches 

Now take a look at the sort of citations you get for products advertised in magazines like Exchange and Mart. Here we have adverts for many products that are not aimed at professionals - money making schemes and the like.  In such circumstances it seems to be the norm to write "AH, north London" at the end of a comment, and I suspect that this is accepted by the punters who buy these products.  (I am a little vague on this I must admit because I have no direct experience of advertising such products).

My point is that different people have different expectations and different experience of citations.  For professionals the best citation is one that is unusual and fulsome in its praise, not a mere repetition of what is often said, nor a simplistic short phrase, and it must be followed by the name, job and location of the person who said it.

In other areas you might find that "Excellent value - JG, Orkney" works very well - but that does not mean it works every where.   

Also you should be wary of over- and underplaying your hand.  Overplaying is more than three citations of a couple of sentences each.  Underplaying is one short citation which could easily have been said by your mate.   

Finally, as in so many issues in direct mail, take a look at what your rivals are doing.  What they are doing may or may not be right, but seeing how they do or don't use citations will give you a clue as to the market.   Experiment with how you use them, and then try to be different from the competition.  Where they say nothing, say a lot.   Where they say, "excellent value" get someone to say, "I can't think of any other product we use in the office where my colleagues have gone out of their way to tell me how good it is."

Free analysis of your mailshot

This article is written by Tony Attwood, Chairman of Hamilton House Mailings Ltd.  If you would like to discuss the writing or design of your mailing campaign, or indeed a single mailshot, with Tony, without cost or obligation, just call 01536 399 000, or email Creative@hamilton-house.com   You can also send Tony a copy of your latest advert and he will call you back with his thoughts on how your response rate could be raised - again without cost or obligation.